Manos

Chuck Norris giving a thumbs-up with text "TAKE DOWN COMMUNION IN THE HAND" in bold letters. He is wearing a gray shirt and has a can of Pepsi next to him. The text references Catholic communion practices."

Chuck Norris (Fr. George Rutler) on Communion in the Hand

If you’ve ever been a fan of kung fu movies or action films, you can always tell who the prize fighters are. Maybe Bruce Lee or Chuck Norris. But then they reveal the bad guy. The best of these films always have you wondering how the good guy is going to win. You know he’s going to. You can’t wait…

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Two men in suits and ties, one laughing loudly with mouth open, set against a dimly lit bar scene. Text reads: "When someone says communion in the hand is 'perfectly' legal." The scene suggests a humorous or dramatic reaction to this statement, likely involving Catholic themes."

Communion in the Hand is “Perfectly” Legal?

When famous ponzi scheme fraudster Bernie Madoff was apprehended, he defended himself by positing that “I was only doing what everyone else was.” I can recall trying that defense as a child:  everyone else is doing it…  The implication is plain:  …so it must be OK.  That never really worked with my parents (nor should…

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A man with short hair wearing a dark gray t-shirt, grimacing and holding his ears with both hands. He appears to be in a room with beige walls.

Ever Get Tempted to Give up Catholics for Lent?

I get a little edgier this time of year every year now. It’s because of the stupid, vapid advice I see repeated about lent. The Forum has posted a lot of good posts about lent on social channels recently. One was this piece of gold by Cindy Paslawski. In it, she asks whether traditional lent is optional. And she…

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A collage featuring vintage circus posters and newspaper clippings with bold red text "FREAK SHOW BAZAAR." Includes a smiling child and various circus attractions like mermaids, strongmen, and oddities. Text reads: "I wish I never had kids. There. I said it." and various circus advertisements."

MacLean’s Brings the Contraception Freak Show to Mainstream

The cover of the February 2018 Maclean’s magazine (a Canadian publication) features a smiling woman holding a young smiling boy over her head. If you did not read the text yet, it looks like fun. She looks happy. But, emblazoned across her face is a bold pink banner that reads “I wish I never had kids. There. I said…

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Papal Visit Prizes! Announcement with a red arrow pointing to a Commander Cross of the Equestrian Order of St. Gregory the Great, featuring gold and red colors. Text reads: "All diplomatic visitors in June win this Commander Cross of the Equestrian Order of St. Gregory the Great! Get yours today - Book your visit now!!!"

“I put the Calf in the Oven”, “we give Papal Awards to anyone that visits”, and Slavery

One my favorite lame excuses of all time should be enshrined and burned into the memory of every child. It should be repeated now and then while drinking — everyone at the table laugh and laugh and laugh. It should be the first example off our lips when someone dissembles…  “I put the gold in the oven…

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A religious painting depicting the Nativity scene with Mary, Joseph, baby Jesus, and shepherds. The text reads: "Come let us adore him born of the Virgin Mary for our salvation." One shepherd is labeled with "Who are those guys?"

The First Church Liturgy: Angels Adoring, Shepherds Give Glory – All History is Changed

Let Our Lord remember your stinky self as one of the shepherds that bent a knee in the stable.

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A man and Martin Luther side by side with text: "NEW Church Logic? Writing Letter to Pope with non-heretical questions is bad. We should praise Luther's desire to make a reformed Church." The man wears glasses and brown robes, while Luther is in historical attire with a black hat."

We Can All Breathe Easier Now that Fr. Weinandy resigned from the USCCB

Today, a dangerous force creeping into the Church was solidly quashed and quelled. After all, one must take firm and swift actions to keep the public order, right? After all, asking questions of the Holy Father is subversive and confusing to the laity. They might think the wrong thing. They might be encouraged to question his authority as…

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Bellarmine Punching Out Martin Luther

Halloween Apostasy: Celebrating the Greatest Trick or Treat Disaster. Ever.

Once you understand the two reasons all apostates leave Mother Church, you will understand why people are commemorating Martin Luther this year. You see, Martin Luther was just a pedestrian apostate. His reasons weren’t that different from the others. The problem was that Luther hit the jackpot. And today, in the midst of Amoris Laetitia and similar confusion, people…

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A star map showing constellations like Virgo, Leo, and Bootes with the Sun, Mercury, Mars, and Jupiter visible. The sky is blue transitioning to night, with the horizon at the bottom. Date and time displayed: 2017-09-23, 10:38 AM.

Feast of St. George and the “Revelations 12 sign”… end of the world?

Once again, being Catholic with normal daily devotions makes one “rapture ready” and apocalypse proof. Over the past year, I have seen here and there various reports of the astrological alignment occurring today. Evangelicals, in particular, have been positing that this all has to do with Israel (the state made in the 1900’s, not the Old…

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A man in clerical attire with a seal featuring a star and text, including "DECODING" and "LOVE?!" in red. Background shows Latin text, suggesting a Catholic context."

This is Why Fr. James Martin Makes no Sense – Your Annie Oakley Decoder Ring

I promise you that this post will become a decoder ring for you to read Fr. James Martin and others in the AmChurch. You’ll laugh and rub your hands with glee as you will be able to predict exactly what he’ll say about things. You see, he’s just a modernist, in my humble opinion, and he’s following…

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